Resolutions Are Bullsh*T, Unless You Do This One Thing
“It's one year from now. December 2023. The habit you were hoping to build during the year didn't stick. What is the most likely reason it failed?” – James Clear
How you begin and end 2023 can change dramatically
It’s that time of year when everyone is posting about manifesting and resolutions and self-care. Those are all great things that can create positive change in your life. But does it last? For most of us, it’s yes, yes, yes for the first month, starts to slow down around month 2 and then it’s all totally lost/forgotten in the everyday realities of our lives and you feel stuck again. What if you had a powerful framework that could provide clarity and focus to your thoughts so that you could move your life forward?
The one thing that completely changes the outcome
Action. Period. End of story. This is how you rewire your brain to work for you instead of its default comfort zone, which keeps you stuck, mired in self-doubt, fear and confusion. Sitting around making excuses and ruminating gets you literally nowhere, it just wastes your valuable time. The only thing that avoiding your dreams offers is safety. Truly committing to yourself is incredibly scary because you actually need to DO THE THING. But it’s also pretty fucking cool.
Make resolutions but embrace reinvention
Resolutions, manifesting, visualization. These are all great concepts that I do believe in. But they are only the beginning; because without action, they quickly become wishful thinking. To make the shift from dreaming to reinvention you need to find a framework that works for you, craft your plan and get to work (for me, coaching is the key because it keeps me accountable). The only thing that delivers the results that you are wanting in your life are actions. And contrary to some advice, it doesn't have to be one, big Jerry Maguire type stunt. Current thinking shows that massive action usually looks like a lot of small steps forward until you arrive at your destination.
In a recent podcast, Mel Robbins stated that the pursuit of our dreams is what shows us who we are, not the achieving as we might think. Because through the pursuit we see the sheer grit and determination that we are made of (badasses, hello?!). She says, "Manifestation is mentally training to get what you want. If you think and feel what you want to create in your life, it prepares you to take action, and boosts your confidence."
Mel Robbins 4 steps to shift from wishing to achieving:
1) Tell the truth; this does not work if you are lying to yourself or are fuzzy about what you want.
2) Don’t visualize the end, visualize the steps and the actions you are going to take to get there. Yes, the boring and tedious stuff. (She supports this with the science of socializing your mind to take action.)
3) Feel it in your body. Feel what it’s like to work for it. Visualize all the steps necessary to get there.
4) The final, most important step according to neuroscience. TAKE ACTION. Manifesting gets your fears out of the way, but then you need to take the actions, the effort, the work that is required.
Flash forward to the end of 2023, what is the intentional and dramatic change that you have created in your life?